Timing Isn't Everything
by RappAddict
Summary: MarkRoger slash. Roger's always loved Mark, Mark's never loved Roger. But after 12 years of hiding his feelings, Roger tries to move on from Mark. After 12 years however, Mark is starting to see his best friend in a different light.
1. Chapter 1

So here's the deal, I've known Roger since I was like 9. At first, he was like Collins before Collins actually came along. He would watch out for me, make sure I didn't get picked on and he was more like an older brother than a friend. Not to say that brothers aren't friends, there was just that kind of 'he's above me' attitude that little brothers always have. I wanted to be just like him, and I tried to be like him in subtle ways so as not to make him think I was a freak or anything.

But then, Collins came along in high school. He sort of picked up the older brother role, being 5 months older than Roger and a year older than me. So Roger took up the best friend role.

After high school, Collins and I went to college and Roger did his band thing. A few months later, we all ended up together again, sharing a shitty loft in Greenwich Village, taking on the role of roommates.

Roger decides to give up smack, and I become his keeper. I watched after him, I made sure he ate, I made sure he slept, and most of all I made sure he didn't do smack.

Now it's back to the same ol', same ol'. Roger mopes, I cope, Collins hopes. Roger strums, I film, Collins teaches; nothing out of the ordinary happens, nothing changes. So when did I start seeing Roger as a hot, rock god instead of my best friend? When did I start wondering what it would be like to kiss him instead of what it would be like if we actually had cash? I know I haven't had a girl in a long time, since Maureen five months ago and maybe it's just being lonely puts thoughts in your head. But now whenever we go out, I find myself looking at Roger instead of all the other beautiful girls around me.

Actually, I can pinpoint the exact day I started my crush: September 23rd, 1992. Roger had come home from his bartending job and I had come home from filming. We were hungry, as usual and decided to go to the Life since we actually had some money.

We headed out in the cold New York air, the breeze sending chills up my spine. I felt a warm arm around my shoulders and looked up to see Roger's arm draped across me. Just a friendly gesture I know, but the thing is the moment his arm touched my shoulder, more chills resonated through my body. Not from the wind anymore, but from his touch. I shrugged it off and kept walking, loving the feeling of Roger's warm body next to mine. About a block away from the café, Roger removed his arm and I looked up to see two beautiful emeralds staring down at me. A slight smile graced his face and I almost whispered, "beautiful". I didn't, but I came so close that my cheeks burned.

"You ok?" He asked me.

I looked down, trying to hide my reddening cheeks. "Yeah, I'm fine. You?"

"I'm great."

My head jerked up to see not a sarcastic look or an apathetic face, but a genuine smile. I couldn't remember the last time I saw Roger smile like that. And again, that one word popped into my mind: beautiful. That's all that could describe him with his green scarf wrapped around his neck, the golden skin of his face shining, his brilliant green eyes, and his smile beaming; beautiful. He looked down at me, the amazing smile still present and I smiled back. His pink lips parted to show his perfect white teeth and I noticed that he had actually shaved. I almost reached up to touch his now smooth jaw-line, of course I restrained my hand.

"What?" He asked with a chuckle. "Do I have something on my face?" He asked.

"No, you just actually shaved."

"Well, yeah. I do have to shave every once in a while. I don't want to be Z.Z. Top or anything."

"It just looks different."

"Bad different?"

"No, just…different different." I smiled and as the wind blew through Roger's hair, he started to move but it seemed as if he were gliding, like an angel. The sun shone down on him, and his golden hair shone brightly and seemed even more luminous than I remembered. And then I knew it: I was in love with Roger Davis.


	2. Chapter 2

So here's the deal, I've known Mark since like grade school. I first met him when some kids were pushing him around on the playground. He looked so defenseless that I had to come to his rescue. After that, we sorta became best buds. And ever since then, I've had a crush on him. But I knew that boys liking boys was wrong in my parent's eyes, and when you're 10 you basically believed what they did. So I tried to stop liking him, tried to focus on the girls. But no matter how hard, Mark was always there looking cuter, being more understanding. But I had to like girls; that's just the way it was.

Fast-forward 3 years and enter: Tom Collins, a breath of fresh air for the high school. Collins was masculine and strong, smart and witty, and most of all- gay and proud. We fell into the same group of friends and I became aware that being gay was nothing to be ashamed of. Collins was proud of his sexuality, why couldn't I be?

Enter: screaming girls. Oh yeah, that's why. My rock star image has made me the hottest thing on campus. Every girl wanted a piece of 'Roger the rock god'. Finally one day, I couldn't take it. I broke down in the bathroom. And who walks in but Collins?

Flashback

"Roger? Rog are you in here?" A gruff voice echoed through the bathroom.

I wiped away the tears that stained my face and answered, "no".

Collins chuckled and found my hiding place- the last stall. He nudged the door open and sat down next to me on the probably toxic floor.

"What's up Hollywood?"

"That's what's up!"

"What?!"

"The whole 'Hollywood' thing. I can't get a moment alone with my best friends without getting swarmed or called or stalked!"

"What are you talking about boy? You love them girls!" Collins smiled.

"…"

"Don't you?"

"Define 'love'."

"You actually expect me to believe that you hate all those girls throwing themselves at you, giving themselves to you?"

"Maybe…"

"Alright." Collins sighed.

"What?"

"What's going on?"

"Nothing!" I lied.

"Boy, you better know that I know you too well to believe that."

"Yeah…but…I can't."

"Why?"

"Cause…" I sounded like a five-year old.

"Roger you can tell me anything! I'm good at keeping promises." He said seriously.

I sighed and finally gave in. If I didn't tell someone, then I could end up telling Mark how I felt and that would be worse that telling Collins.

"…IlikeMark…" I mumbled.

"You lie in the dark?"

I took a deep breath. "I like Mark."

"Ohh! Well of course you do, everyone likes that boy."

"No Collins…"

"Ohhh! You mean like…?"

I nodded.

"Oh. Wow. So you're gay?"

"No! I mean, yes I mean-ugh. I don't know. It's not like I don't find girls unattractive, I just find Mark more attractive; but only Mark. No other guys- just him." I played with a loose thread from my shirt, trying to look anywhere but Collins' face.

"So you're crushing on your best friend." Collins said calmly.

"I guess I am." I finally admitted. "Col, what do I do?"

A look of pain came over my friend's face and he laid a friendly hand on my shoulder. "I'm sorry."

"You can't help me?"

"No, I just know that Mark is in love with Maureen Johnson."

"What, that girl who goes to his Temple?"

Collins nodded.

"Shit."

"Yep."

"So I just hide it like I always have."

"That's not healthy Rog, look at where it got you so far."

"Yeah, but I've held it in for 6 years. Another 6 couldn't hurt."

Collins eyebrows shot up. "Tell him."

"What?!"

"Tell. Him."

"Mark?"

"No- our principal- yes Mark! You need to tell him."

"No, I can't. It'd ruin our friendship."

"So you'd rather suffer?"

"If it means staying friends with him, then yes."

"You know that after about 10 years this'll be killing you- right?"

"Then I'll tell him on my death bed. He doesn't feel that way about me, and I'd rather keep my true feelings hidden and stay friends, then spill my guts and lose my best friend."

"You love him."

"Oh- is that what that gnawing feeling at my gut is everytime I see him? I know I do Col. I also know that I can't do anything about it."

Collins patted my shoulder understandingly. "Don't stay in here all day." He said on his way out.


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: So here's the last chapter, it took a while to get up cause of my other stories- which all readers should check out for more Roger/Mark. So yeah, hoped you guys liked it! R&R please!

* * *

Roger hid his feelings from Mark for 9 years. Through Sarah, Michelle, April, and Mimi. After Mimi almost died in December of 1991 though, he realized that he could be going any day now. Any day, and Mark would never know. So, he stayed with Mimi for her last three months on earth, holding her hand and playing her songs; and then she was gone.

He would have cried, but he knew that she had lived every moment like it was her last. She had lived a good life, and he had loved her. But now he had to let her go. Now he had to find a way to tell Mark his true feelings.

It was now 1993 and the two each had steady jobs. Roger bartended at a bar a block down the road and Mark filmed for an independent film agency.

"Hey Mark?" Roger asked one day while the two were hanging out in the loft, Roger reading the Village Voice and Mark making some tea.

"Yeah Roger?"

"Have you ever liked a guy?" Roger said casually, flipping a page of the paper.

The tea that Mark had started sipping spewed out of his mouth. The noise made Roger turn around to see a stunned Mark and a stained counter.

"Wha-what?" Mark stuttered.

"Have you ever, ya know, liked a guy? As more than a friend?" Roger asked nonchalantly, going back to his paper.

"Um, why?" Mark asked suspiciously.

"Just wonderin' that's all."

"Have you?" Mark sat in a chair across from Roger.

"Yeah…" Roger said as if it were a painfully obvious answer.

"Oh. Who?"

Roger looked up from his paper, emeralds meeting sapphires. "Someone." _Come on Davis_, Roger coached himself, _tell him!_

"C'mon Rog, who?" Mark peered.

_Good ol' Mark, giving me another chance. _Roger stared at the same sentence he had been staring at for the whole conversation. "You." He said, his eyes never leaving the page.

More tea spewed from the filmmaker's mouth.

"Ya might wanna clean that up." Roger said unphased.

"Me?! You like me?!" Mark laid his mug down on a table.

"Yeah." Roger said, eyes still focused on the paper.

"Roger?"

"Yeah?"

"Roger- put the damn paper down will you? You just confessed to liking me- why aren't you reacting at all…unless…you don't anymore?"

Roger put the paper down and looked up into Mark's confused eyes. "I still like you Mark." He said calmly.

"Oh. Well, then that might be good."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean…" Mark sat next to Roger on the couch. "I like you too."

As soon as the words left Mark's mouth, both men's lips crashed together. Years of primal urges and unfulfilled desire let loose and finally, both men felt free.

That night after cautious sex and close cuddling Mark and Roger lay in the filmmaker's bed, holding each other.

"Roger?" Mark asked, his head resting on the rocker's chest.

"Hm?" Roger mumbled, his eyes closed and his hand running through Mark's hair.

"How long have you liked me?"

"Since I first met you."

"In kindergarten?!" Mark rose from his position to stare into his lover's eyes.

"Yep." Roger opened his eyes.

"And you never told me?!"

"Nope."

"Why?"

"Two words- Maureen Johnson."

"Oh…right." Mark resumed his position on Roger's chest.

"How long have you liked me?" Roger asked.

"Since September 23rd, 1992."

"You remember the exact date?" Roger asked, amazed.

"Yep. It was the day I fell in love."

"Just what was so special about September 23rd though? I don't remember having a gig, Mimi died in March, so what happened September 23rd'?"

"I fell in love with you. You and I were walking to the Life, and you put your arm around me, and…I just fell in love with you."

"So why didn't you tell me?" Roger smirked.

"Two words- Mimi Marquez."

"Mimi died Mark."

"Yeah, but you never dated anyone but girls in the past."

"Neither did you." Roger pointed out.

"So I guess we're both…bisexual?" Mark questioned.

"No, I'm Mark-sexual, and you are Roger-sexual." Roger concluded.

Mark smiled. "I like the sound of that."

"I love you."

"I like the sound of that even more." Mark looked up into his lover's eyes, finally happy for the first time since September 23rd, 1992.


End file.
